Why does underwear
have to be under?
Perhaps it's the skid marks
that make others shudder?

Is it 'cause I rarely,
if ever, wash those?
Too bad 'cause I'd like
to show off the caped heroes.

I think that my undies
could make a fine hat.
Or even a sweater
for my pet cat.

But folks act weird
when I wear undies outside.
I don't understand it.
I got nothin' to hide.

People got odd rules
about underpants.
"Don't use 'em for that!",
"Those aren't gloves for your hands!"
Well, my undies are mine
and I'll do what I please.
Hey, don't cringe when I use 'em
to wipe a sneeze.

-B.C. Byron