I hope you know how low it is
to double dip a chip.
It's rude and crude for bitten food
to make a second trip.
In manners school they teach the rule
that double dipping isn't cool.
Don't be a punk and double dunk
a chip that touched a lip.
"Just think of others," Mother said.
That's why I TRIPLE dip.
-B.C. Byron
I enjoy a good tray of layered bean dip at Christmas and New Year’s Eve parties. You know, the kind they have at the supermarket refrigerated section with refried beans, tomatoes, guacamole and green onions, all topped with shredded cheddar cheese. It’s the kind of dip that you load so heavy with each scoop that it often breaks the chip. You just can’t get enough on there at once. When eating the perfect chip dip, it also makes absulute sense to maximize the chip usage by going back in for another dip. Every square inch matters. It would be a terrible shame if they ran out of chips and there was still a pile if beany cheesy goodness left in the tray. Scooping it out the leftovers with a spoon just isn’t as tasty.
Well, not everyone understands this scenario as you can tell from the poem above. I’ve even tried turning the chip around to use the unbitten corners for each subsequent dip, ensuring that the germs are as far from the food contact edge as possible. THAT got complaints too. I even dipped extra fast so the bacteria wouldn’t have time to move across the chips between bites. Eveyone knows germs are slow (5 second rule proves this). There’s just no pleasing some people. Where are the people at the party complaining about all the dip-wasting germophobes, huh? Buying more chips isn’t a solution either. Can’t maximize your dip intake if the belly gets filled up with undipped chip corners.
I like how this short poem turned out because I was able to cram 2 or 3 rhymes into each line in some spots. It’s always a bonus to get intra-line rhymes and alliteration (repeated letter sounds) all in one go. Sometimes I go back through older poems and think about how I can rework them with more alliteration. If you spend the time, you’ll find there’s almost always a synonym or two that can be plopped in to improve the flow of a poem. Keep iterating until anyone can read your poem for the first time and automatically fall right into the rhythm. Be careful though. Too much alliteration can make a poem into an impossible tongue twister.
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